Getting Better with Age?

So Barry Bonds broke the all-time home run record this week. It has not been without controversy, as some have suggested that he has used performance enhancing substances (steroids), and there have been pictures posted at the beginning of his career and now:

I'm not sure if he is guilty or not, but I don't mind that he has the record. Records are made to be broken, and someday his name will be replaced. As far as I know, he has never tested positive for any banned substance ... of course athletes with millions of dollars may be able to keep one or two (or many) steps ahead of the testing agencies. With that said, I'd like to enter my own evidence ... and you can judge whether or not I am also guilty of using performance enhancing substances:

Despite the quality of the more recent photograph (Kalei is a budding photographer who loves to take pictures), I think that you can see the definate change in my body that has taken place over just a few years... OK, I admit to ingesting performance enhancing substances ... if by "performance enhancing" you mean that I am actually slower and can't jump as high as I once could, and by "substances" you mean cookies, ice cream, and pizza. I would just like to think of it as getting better with age. Hey, if Barry Bonds can do it, so can I.